Dear baby not to be,
Today would have been your due date. 7-11. The OB at my first appointment joked that with this due date, I should get a free slurpy. It wasn’t funny then, and it isn’t now.
They were right, time does dull the pain. But I still think of you every day. I am still sad that I never got to meet you. I am still heartbroken that my body failed you. Other than a digital picture of the positive pregnancy test, there is no proof that you ever existed. And yet I miss you so much.
I wish I had you in my arms today. Instead, I wipe my tears and stare at the little angel figurine holding a child. I hope the angel is taking good care of you, my baby. I miss you.
Long time ago, I saw a card that struck a chord with me. It showed a fork in the road. An arrow was pointed in each direction. One said, "My life." The other said, "No longer an option." This blog is about my life. The choices I make are my life. Everything else is no longer an option.
Who Am I?
I am Kate. I am married to the Husband of 10 years--a man who totally rocks my world with his mind, his body and his soul. I am a mother to Child--an energetic six-year-old who is so much more outgoing than his parents. I am a professional in the field that I love--but currently in a job that makes me yearn for more.
Expanding our family proved more difficult than we expected. After a diagnosis of unexplained secondary infertility, a pregnancy, a devastating miscarriage and then finally a viable pregnancy, we are now a family of four, with the birth of Baby in October 2007.
I have many more questions than answers, and this is my venting space.
Expanding our family proved more difficult than we expected. After a diagnosis of unexplained secondary infertility, a pregnancy, a devastating miscarriage and then finally a viable pregnancy, we are now a family of four, with the birth of Baby in October 2007.
I have many more questions than answers, and this is my venting space.
Child is
Baby is
2 comments:
oh kate, i'm so sorry. i wish i had something useful to say but of course know it wouldn't help anyway. just thinking of you.
Time does dull the pain, but I've found it never goes away. That baby will always be close you you. Hope you're doing okay otherwise x
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