Wednesday, March 19, 2008


This conversation happened as I was putting Child to bed tonight.

Child: Mommy, what does this ring mean?

Me: It means I am married to Daddy.

Child: Oh [disappointed]... But I want to be married to you.

Me: But you can’t be married to me. You can’t marry your mommy.

Child: Not even when I grow up?

Me: Not even when you grow up. But when you grown up, I hope you will find a person whom you will love very much and you will want to spend the rest of your life with her.

Child: [tears in the eyes] But what about you?

Me: What about me?

Child: [tears now flowing down his face] But I don’t want to be away from you. I will miss you.

Me: [fighting back the tears] Well... Maybe you can still live with us.

Child: Could you please make sure Baby will live with us then too?

Me: OK.

For the next few minutes, as I listened to him listing all of the girls he currently knows and pondering to himself which one he would marry, I could not keep the tears from coming. His love is so pure and so unconditional it makes my heart ache. I know that some day I will be counting the days until we can get him out of the house. I know that some day he and Baby will fight and scream how much they hate each other. I know that living with your grown children is not anyone’s vision of a happy retirement.

But today... today the thought of being away from him is as scary and heartbreaking and unfathomable to me as it is to him.